I possess so much power, we all do. We have the power to allow negativity or positivity in our lives. The power to choose right or wrong. I especially love having the power to say YES and No. “I love you can we date?” NO. “Can you help me with work?” NO. “Will you hang out with us tonight?” NO. I love never having to explain why, because NO is a complete sentence.
The answer to these questions could also be a YES depending on how that will impact your life. I have used No more lately, I have let go of destructive habits and said no to people. I have said No to relationships that do not build me. I have said No to a certain lifestyle. I have also said yes. I have said Yes to taking care of myself, I have said Yes to loving myself, I have said Yes to motivating myself.
It has not been easy, at some point I keep sliding back to old habits, trying to fix people, trying to control things and people. It’s a learning process. I am not where I was yesterday I have actually gotten far and like Jonathan McReynolds I pray that God helps me maintain.
That He helps me love myself more every day, to be able to look in the mirror and call that woman beautiful every day, to call her loved. I pray He helps me maintain the confidence I am gaining, that I may not be hard on myself for making mistakes or failing.
I pray he continues to give me the strength to let go of everything that is not of Him.
I am also learning to love the process, to live in the moment and not get so focused on what I lack. I have my vision board all clear, everything I want to achieve this year. I am almost there but even as I plan I am learning to live today, enjoying simple things in life, like catching up with an old friend, reading a book or even catching up with a television show.
I am learning self-love, something easily said but hardly done. We think we love ourselves but we never show ourselves the love, think of that guy or lady who says they love you but their actions say otherwise, and are you that guy or lady to yourself? Self-love is loving myself with all my flaws, it’s doing things I know she loves.
She loves music, so I get her some nice music and play it when she is tired or when she is going about her house chores. She loves to catch a movie so I get her nice movies and a ticket to go to the movies. Her mind is blown away by words, I read her poems and get her books that change her perception of life.
She is an introvert and gets energy just being alone, so I take her out on a date, catch a table for her at the corner and order her coffee. She loves Jesus so I take her to places she can learn more of Him and get her all the materials she needs to build a relationship with Him.
She is a happy girl, her soul is beautiful and I am sorry that I took time to know her. I would have protected her from all the tears, the pain and the lies that the world showed her. I would have showed her earlier on how to let go but I guess she needs me more now so I am present. She will no longer have to face all that because I am here to protect her and more so to love her beyond her wildest imagination.